I woke up late this morning. Mostly because I stayed up late last night to keep reading "The Fifth Wave". It's been a long time since I've been able to read a book for pleasure. I've been trying to make some time for myself lately for personal leisure and exercise, but then I have to cut into my sleep time (which, coincidentally, is also time for myself).
When I finally got out of bed, I remembered that I hadn't finished my theory homework. Theory is going well for me so far this semester. As an analytical person, the series of rules for part writing seem to come pretty easily, even though I have an occasional parallel fifth in there.
As I was working on my homework, my daughter Laura thought she would be helpful and let our dogs back in. They had been outside for about 20 minutes or so. It's been rainy for days (and days and days) now, so the yard is pretty much nothing but mud. As luck would have it, the dogs ran right past Laura, tracking mud throughout the house and then right into my office where I was working. Frustrated and sleep deprived and rushing to get my work done, I screamed at Laura to clean the floors while I bathed the dogs for the third time in 24 hours.
After finishing my homework and managing to get everyone off to school and work, I finally sat down to get some "real" work done on my day job before heading off to school. My day job is going pretty well and I was really looking forward to participating in a virtual conference this week for Humana learning professionals. As I checked my work email and planned out my work day, the storm started.
It was really windy and dumping buckets of rain, which made me nervous that one of the hidden leaks in my house (we have 2) would act up. As I put a bucket into place, I heard a thump, but didn't think much of it. Mostly, I was annoyed that I had to wait out the heavy rain to leave for school, delaying my morning yet again.
The rain calmed down and I headed to campus to get some ear training lab work in before my theory class. Only, when I opened the garage door, I saw this:
I checked to make sure there wasn't a hole in the roof of my house, snapped this photo, then left for school. I sent it to my hubby and our neighbors (the tree is in between our houses). Does that give you a sense of how rational I am? I knew the tree wasn't going anywhere and there was no immediate danger to my house, so why miss class?
When I got to school, the lab was locked, so I went to get one of my instructors to open it. Only it wasn't actually locked. Hadn't I tried the lock? Well, no. It was raining and I was frustrated, so when I saw the light off I just made some assumptions. Of course.
As if my morning needed the extra special kick-in-the-pants, I spent nearly an hour working on harmonic dictation. I can tell you right now, it sucks. I'm hoping for a miracle to get my ears to understand what they're hearing before the end of the semester. Pray for me.
After school, I came home and examined the damage more fully.
Thankfully, there was really very little damage. The gutter was still fine, the shed was fine, no big holes in the roof. My awesome neighbors were already working on getting a tree guy. I tried to get back to my "real" work, only to my surprise there was no power in the house (totally unrelated to the tree, but related to the storms for sure).
So, I gave up on work for a bit and went to lunch to wait out the power repair. I came home an hour later, when they promised the power would be back on, and still no power. So I waited another hour (using up the last of my phone battery). Still no power, so I decided to head to Starbucks with the kids for power and wi-fi. Only as we were walking out the door, the neighbors kids came to ask if they could stay at our house. Turns out they were locked out because of the power outage.
So, I had to wait for the neighbors kids' Dad to come home and then for the tree guys to remove the tree.
Of course, now it is three hours later and I still have done no "real" work. And the power is still out.
Of course, now it is three hours later and I still have done no "real" work. And the power is still out.
I finally get to leave for Starbucks. Within minutes of getting my peppermint mocha in my hand, my son texts me that the power is on. Of course it is, now that I'm at Starbucks. These are the days when "working from home" is not all it's cracked up to be.
Of course, my evening was packed, so I couldn't stay at Starbucks very long. It was already time to start my chauffeur service to Laura's karate class and come home to more yet more dog washing, more things to do, more places to be.
Perhaps because of the rough start to my day, I was feeling pretty grumpy by the time my evening rehearsals came around. First up was rehearsal at First Pres for their Service of Psalms on Sunday afternoon (y'all come). Of course, that meant missing ORUUC choir for second week. It's a powerful reminder of the difficult choices I have to make sometimes to follow this calling and gather experience to live out my purpose. I've noticed a growing sense of frustration rising in me -- I'm not able to commit to the organizations and causes I love, like stepping down from leadership in our Allies for Racial Equity group. The passion is still there, but I have to be reasonable about the limits of my body and time. It's tough.
I had to put piano lessons on hold this semester for similar reasons. My plan is to do weekly lessons this summer to keep progressing in my skills. But, for now, I can't add one more thing to the schedule. Lots of frustrated self talk.
Why won't I take more risks with the things I do make time for? Why don't I volunteer when a teacher or conductor asks for one? What am I so afraid of? Why do I have to practice everything behind closed doors before I try it in front of others? I wish I were more comfortable taking risks.
Sheesh. My day has totally damaged my psyche. Time for a break.
So, I dragged my sad self into rehearsals at First Pres and then ORUUC. I was graciously welcomed by both congregations. I am lucky to be surrounded by excellent musical mentors and talented vocalists in both churches. I come to the end of my day and am asked to do a solo for this weekend. And I say yes, determined to take more risks and learn from the chaos inside my head today.
And I am lucky to come to the end of this day with deep gratitude for all that is my life, even when it gets a little hectic.
I had to put piano lessons on hold this semester for similar reasons. My plan is to do weekly lessons this summer to keep progressing in my skills. But, for now, I can't add one more thing to the schedule. Lots of frustrated self talk.
Why won't I take more risks with the things I do make time for? Why don't I volunteer when a teacher or conductor asks for one? What am I so afraid of? Why do I have to practice everything behind closed doors before I try it in front of others? I wish I were more comfortable taking risks.
Sheesh. My day has totally damaged my psyche. Time for a break.
So, I dragged my sad self into rehearsals at First Pres and then ORUUC. I was graciously welcomed by both congregations. I am lucky to be surrounded by excellent musical mentors and talented vocalists in both churches. I come to the end of my day and am asked to do a solo for this weekend. And I say yes, determined to take more risks and learn from the chaos inside my head today.
And I am lucky to come to the end of this day with deep gratitude for all that is my life, even when it gets a little hectic.
This, too, shall pass.
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