Season of Song (December 2015)

Wow, December certainly flew by with great fanfare.  Let me see if I can sing it's praises.

First, school ended for the semester at the beginning of the month.  Look ma, all A's!  I was proud to overcome the challenges of balancing school work with the rest of my life (day job, church jobs, choir rehearsals, spouse, kids, etc.) and the challenges of the classes themselves (remembering to include the inversion, trying to hear inversions in the ear training lab, playing my jury piano pieces).  I've also enjoyed this break between semesters to recuperate!

As is my usual plan for December, I spent the month singing.  A lot.  The month kicked off with the Messiah Sing-a-long.  The night of the first concert, I got to watch my son Jonathan play with the Jr. Honors Band Clinic before I ran to Norris to sing.  Yay for my musical family!  The evening of the second concert, I got to sing my favorite solo from the work - "Come Unto Him".  Just so beautiful and peaceful - like a sung prayer of rest.  I sigh just thinking about it.

Next came the Clayton Holiday Concerts with the Knoxville Symphony Orchestra.  Most people wonder why in the world I'd want to sing 4 concerts in one weekend.  Honestly, I'm in it for the snow and Santa.  I get to celebrate Christmas with hundreds of people four times in one weekend.  I get to watch kids light up when they see Santa.  I get to hear the audience laugh with glee when the snow falls. I get to watch the Maestro show off his fancy candy cane socks and conduct with a glimmer in his eye and hands waving like Bugs Bunny.  I get to be part of the ongoing selfie competition within the Knoxville Choral Society.  Like this one:

There's just so much fun to be had, and I don't mind 4 concerts in one weekend -- as long as that's not my schedule *every* weekend!

Side note: For two weeks in December, Joshua was out of town, leaving me to be a temporary single Mom.   It reinforced to me how difficult it would be for me to pursue music if I had to manage on my own.  Thankfully, we've got a number of great babysitters to step in when needed.  But my bank account wouldn't be able to support my music schedule on a regular basis.  If you have a friend who is a single Mom musician, please offer them free babysitting.

In the midst of final rehearsals and preparations for Christmas Eve, we managed to sneak in a bit of caroling.  Four of us sang carols at Greenfield Senior Living, much to the delight of residents (including members of our church).  It was a good feeling to look around and see the residents singing along with us.  I felt like we provided a personal musical moment to each of them.

Then came the big day - Christmas Eve!  After last year's fiasco, I was itching to celebrate the season as much as possible.  And my wish was granted in full.  The evening began with ORUUC's Children's Choir singing "Every Voice That Sings" and "Do You Hear What I Hear".  They did such a great job - I wanted to cry and shout and cheer!  They had memorized their music, waited patiently for their turn to sing, and sang in two parts.  Way to go, kids!  It was a proud moment that looked kind of like this:

I love that my daughter Laura made special arrangements to get back from a trip with her grandparents so that she could sing with us.  We sat on the chancel together to lead hymns for the congregation.  Yay for my musical family!

After the ORUUC service, I drove over to Westside to lead two choir pieces in the Christmas Eve service.  I had written my first blog post at Westside earlier in the week, so I was hoping to bring that joy of the season to inspire great music.  Thanks to Linda, we had a little Christmas miracle of a soprano section.  We sat the choir up on the chancel -- it felt good to have them so prominent in the service.  And when they stood to sing - what a wonderful sound!  I enjoyed a piece that Mary Donovan picked out that combines the choir singing "Peace Peace" with the congregation singing "Silent Night".  It really came together in a pleasant way, filling the room with sound.  The second piece, "Bring Us Peace" was where the Christmas miracle occurred with a fresh soprano voice that could conquer the descant part.  Probably one of the best things I learned in preparing for Westside's Christmas Eve is that I can trust my instincts -- I made a few minor changes to each song and they both turned out really well!

After Westside's service, I went to find dinner.  Only, I learned a very important lesson - most fast food places close early on Christmas Eve!  I should plan for a packed dinner from home if I pick up three services again in the future. This year, it was lunchables (which my son calls dinnerables when you eat them for dinner) from Walgreens.  Mostly, I survived the evening on Coke Zero and cookies after each service.

I ended Christmas Eve singing with Anna Thomas over at First Presbyterian in Oak Ridge.  After being "in charge" all night, I was glad to be able to relax, sing, and worship myself.  The special music was "Cradle Hymn" and it was amazingly sweet and gentle and beautiful.  I will definitely keep that piece in my Christmas arsenal.

If you thought Christmas Eve would be the end of this post - think again!  AFTER Christmas Eve, I got to reunite with some of my favorite singing buddies (Michael, Dave, and Amanda) to lead service music on Sunday 12/27.  As much as I dreaded it, my favorite part of the service was singing "Let It Go" from Frozen.  We ended up inviting the kids from the congregation who knew it to come sing along - and that made it so much more fun for me.  THEN, for New Year's Eve, ORUUC had a coffeehouse, where another favorite singing buddy Amber convinced a group of us to get together and sing.  We chose "Sound of Silence" from Paul Simon.  It was hauntingly beautiful and I'm looking forward to singing with that group again soon.

And now, silence it is.  I'm quietly working away at selecting pieces and leading rehearsals, waiting for school to start back in mid-January and just generally enjoying a sigh of relief from living very fully in December.  Time to rest.

So Much to be Thankful For (November 2015) -- Part One

It's December 1, and I've barely had a moment to reflect on my very rich life right now.  The musical journey is incredible and I am overflowing with gratitude.  In fact, I have decided to list 30 things I am thankful for - one for each day in November.  So brace yourselves for the longest post in a while, friends.

1.  Joshua.  Did you know this man does our family laundry now?  It's one thing that I don't have to worry about in my life.  Clean clothes just appear in our bedroom every few days.  He also picks up Laura from karate so I can make it to my choir rehearsal on time.  He figures out dinner most weekday evenings and some weekends, even if that means a run to Outback carryout because I'm too exhausted to move from the couch.  In order for me to keep up my frantic pace of work, school, music work, and music ensembles, there has to be someone behind the scenes keeping me together.  Thankfully, I've got an amazing silent partner.

2.  Jonathan.  I totally luck out in the timing of this call to music ministry.  Or maybe I was more open to the call because of the timing in my life.  Either way, my independent 12-year-old needs so little day-to-day care from me at this point that I am able to pursue my dreams.  This boy wakes up in the 5AM hour every morning without an alarm clock.  He gets himself dressed, makes himself breakfast, and is out the door by 6:30.  Most mornings I get up around 6:15 just to make sure there's nothing that needs signed for school.  He helps to carry in groceries, feed the dogs, and just generally help around the house.  My only concern with him is that he's starting to grow a mustache and he's only about an inch shorter than me now.  The teenage years come too quickly!

3.  Laura.  I think I've found myself a cheerleader.  This girl gets dragged to church early nearly every Sunday because I'm involved in something musical.  I think I've heard her complain once in all that time.  She loves helping me with ORUUC's Children's Choir, including listening in to give a kids perspective when I'm deciding on new music.  She's also the puppy caretaker, a job she is always happy to fulfill.  Our puppy cries when she goes upstairs to bed, even though Josh and I are still there to play with her.  Somehow Laura is just more fun than we are.  Laura is also the queen of being excited about life.  Everywhere we go, she's the first to say, "Mom, look at that!"  She sings along and dances to her favorite songs on the radio.  She reminds me that life is meant to be lived.

4.  Parents.  My parents in all forms.  My Mom, my Dad, my Dad's girlfriend, my in-laws.  Each of them carry me along this journey in some way.  My Mom sent me condolence cards when my dogs passed away and then a gift card to PetSmart when we adopted new ones.  My Dad and his girlfriend invited us over for an amazing Thanksgiving feast and then came to my first Christmas concert of the season.  My in-laws are taking the kids for a few days over Winter Break.  It takes a village.

5.  Clara.  After the heartbreak of losing our two dogs within a week of one another, Clara has been the beacon of light that there is truly more love somewhere.  Though timid, Clara has settled right in with our family and has built a deep level of trust in each of us.  It's beautiful.  There is literally no way to avoid a smile when her tail is wagging at you.  This week, Clara is at the vet's office getting her first treatment for heart worm.  I'm looking forward to having her back at home soon.

6.  Milly.  Oh, Milly.  Milly the puppy stole our hearts within the first few minutes we saw her.  She loves everybody, loves to cuddle, and loves to play.  Mostly, she loves to chew.  On anything and everything in our house.  She actually stole Jonathan's slipper from off of his foot.  Fearless and hyper, she's an excellent balance for shy and mellow Clara.  Milly finally slept through the night a few days ago, which has given me renewed energy.  It's impossible not to laugh at her antics.

7.  Oak Ridge Animal Shelter / Friends of Oak Ridge Animal Shelter.  Thank you for rescuing dogs like Clara (Juniper) and Milly (Savannah) so families like mine can experience the vitality they bring to our home.  Special thank you to FORAS for funding Clara's heart worm treatment.

8.  ORUUC.  I don't thank this church enough for all of the encouragement and support I've received. From the early days of questioning why our house band had no sheet music to playing my first piano solo in service, I've received an endless amount of patience, opportunity to grow, and kinds words to carry me on my journey.  Thank you to each and every person who walks along side me on my spiritual path and my musical journey.

9.  Kids Choir.  I've been in my role as ORUUC's Children's Choir Director since August.  I continue to learn from our kids everyday.  Most rehearsals, we start out with a "dance break" where I hook my iPhone to a portable speaker and play a song for us all to move a little bit.  I started letting the kids pick the music and got a pleasant surprise when one girl asked for Sting's "Fields of Gold" and one boy asked for the Beatles.  The know more about music then I have given them credit for!  They also retain so much information from week to week!  We've learned about quarter notes and rests, eighth notes and half notes.  Even the repeat symbol.  They challenge me to make music fun!

10.  My friends.  I hate grouping all of my friends into one big thank you, but this post would be entirely too long if I mention each person individually.  Thank you to friends who invite me out for lunch, or coffee, or dinner, or dancing.  Thank you to friends who invite my kids over for play dates and sleepovers.  Thank you to friends who are also babysitters.  Thank you to friends who make music with me.  Thank you to friends who teach me music.  Thank you to friends who listen to me vent about really petty stuff in my life.  Thank you to friends who go out of their way to spend time with me.  Thank you to friends who show love when I need it most.  Thank you to one friend in particular for using Kohl's rewards to make my new awesome winter coat more affordable.

11.  My day job.  I'm not sure if I've mentioned lately that my musical journey is truly financed and made possible by my day job.  In general, music classes are not offered in the evenings.  It's not like business classes or classes geared toward working folks.  So, I take my music classes during the day.  Thankfully, my day job in training & development allows me flexibility with a work-at-home schedule, so I am able to take classes early in the morning and at lunchtime.  My day job also pays the bill for school. And, just when you thought things couldn't get better, I have a wonderful boss who actually checks in to see how my musical development is progressing and was genuinely excited for me when I got my choir director job at Westside.  My day job also encourages me to be active, with my running goals built into my performance plan and rewarded with points that can be spent on health items.  Everyone should have a job like this.

12.  My health.  I would guess that at least once a day, someone mentions to me that they could never keep up with my schedule.  I am thankful that my body and mind, in general, let me keep at this breakneck pace.  Occasionally, like this past week, my body reminds me that I need to make time for rest.  But most of the time I'm able to go, then go, then go some more before I collapse into bed and start my day again.  And although I'm not keeping up with my running as much, I have been regularly walking the new dogs and was able to run/walk a 5K on Thanksgiving.

13.  Ebb and flow.  This should probably rank higher on my list.  Without the breaks in my schedule, I would never rest and recover.  My classes are wrapping up for the semester.  One music ensemble has finished our holiday performance and won't rehearse again until January.  Every once in a while, there's that unexpected night off on my calendar.  Those nights I spend on the couch watching Dr. Who with my family. Or spend at karate watching Laura in class instead of just dropping her off.  I treasure those moments when I can reconnect with my family ... and my bed.

14.  Teachers.  I've had some great teachers this semester.  My Music Theory teacher shares new material in a way that makes it approachable.  She gives us hints and tips to remembering all the terms.  I have to admit, I kind of like analyzing music.  It's like solving a puzzle.  My Piano teacher always has a kind word for my pieces and suggests ways to improve to make the music even better.  She's very supportive and encouraging.

15.  Challenges.  Yes, I'm thankful for challenges.  How will I make it through the Ear Training software?  How will I get Jonathan to an audition and Laura to a playdate and myself to a rehearsal at the same time?  How the heck do we add two new dogs (including a puppy!) into the mix of our already busy family life?  These challenges are just asking for creative solutions - they stretch me to think outside of the box.  Sometimes a great plan comes together... and sometimes we learn a valuable lesson for next time.  I once heard a fitness coach talk about how in order to become more fit, you have to "stress the system."  When these challenges pop up, I imagine how we will all grow because we're stressing the system.

Continued in Part Two...

So Much to be Thankful For (November 2015) -- Part Two

Continued from Part One...

16.  My new job.  Yes, for a musical journey blog, this should be higher on the list -- but I wanted to make sure my priorities were straight.  While my life is all about music, my family and friends still come first.  Now... I *adore* my new job as the choir director for Westside UU Church.  I have received a very warm welcome and have already started picking out music for after the holidays.  It's an amazing opportunity to work with a great community and I will definitely make the most of it.  I spent my first choir rehearsal just observing and listening, so I'm looking forward to starting to work with everyone next week.  I spent my first Sunday singing a solo (Josh Groban's "Thankful" -- which inspired the title of this post) and greeting the community.  I'm looking forward to recruiting members into the choir and spending Sundays sharing choir pieces with the community.  

17.  Unexpected moments.  As I was driving to a rehearsal the other day, the sun was setting over the mountains. It was a beautiful sight.  I took a moment to just watch the horizon and breathe.  Moments like that remind me to stop the frantic pace from time to time and just enjoy the view.

18.  Music Ensembles.  The groups that keep me going.  Whether it's our church choir and band, Knoxville Choral Society or Chamber Chorale, or the Messiah Sing-a-long crew, singing with people makes me amazingly happy.  I just kicked off the Christmas season with the Knoxville Chamber Chorale and the Knoxville Chamber Orchestra in a sold out show at the Bijou.  Wow, how fun!

19.  Mentors.  Formal and informal.  Folks I look up to in my day job, in my music ensembles, in my church, in my community.  People who inspire me to work toward my passions.  I hope I do you all proud.

20.  NYC. A nice place to visit, but reminds me that I would never enjoy living in a big city again.  It's the first family vacation we've taken in a while and it was really cool to share the sights and sounds of the city with the kids.  Plus, Lion King on Broadway!

21.  People working toward racial justice.  You know who you are.  ARE, SURJ, BLM, NAACP, and the recent Oak Ridge City Town Halls.  I love you, support you, and can't wait to see the change we can make in this world.

22.  Vacation days.  I had a bunch of days off work this month, between the NYC trip and Thanksgiving.  I'm looking forward to even more coming up at the end of December.

23.  Stevie Wonder.  At 65 years old, he put on a FOUR HOUR concert, with one 20-minute intermission.  I now have proof that I can keep this pace going for the next 30 years.  Bonus thank you that his concert counted as one of my concert reports for my piano lessons this semester.

24.  Shelter.  From the rain.  From the cold.  There may be water in the garage and water stains on the ceiling in the living room, but our home is still doing its job.

25.  Pie Five.  For the many meals and free pizzas I have earned.  Whole grain crusts, veggie toppings, and not a lot of guilt in my speedy lunch/dinner choices.

26.  My phone.  The electronic thing that keeps me organized and sane.

27.  Body parts.  Fingers to play piano, arms to wave to conduct, feet and legs to walk the dogs around the block, eyes to watch my children grow, ears to listen to music and the world around me, shoulders to carry my backpack, knees to get down eye-to-eye with the puppy, and a nose to sniff out the nearest pumpkin pie.

28.  Christmas carols.  Inspired music that helps me remember the best parts of the season.

29.  Adele's "Hello" video.  It gives me the feels.

30.  Rain.  Did you ever have something you were thankful for, but didn't particularly like?  I don't like the rain.  At all.  But, I appreciate that it provides nourishment for the Earth.  And, today, I appreciate that the puppy didn't want to go for a walk in it, so I finally found the time to catch up on this blog.

And there you have it - my update for November and my endless gratitude for the life I lead.  While the storms of poverty, racism, hatred, and disrespect for our environment rage on around us, while the world needs so much more... there's so much to be thankful for.  Taking the time to reflect fuels me for the work ahead.

Exciting News!

On July 22, 2014, I woke up with a calling... to become a UU Music Director.  Since that day, I've gathered resources, spoken with mentors, gone back to school, volunteered for all sorts of music stuff, and just generally kept this purpose in focus.  

Today, I'm really excited to announce that I'm taking another step on this journey toward a musical career.  I've accepted a contract role to lead the choir at Westside Unitarian Universalist Church through next June.  It's a great opportunity to put all my new skills into practice and get more practical experience in music ministry.  I'm looking forward to being able to serve Westside by helping to create vibrant, inspiring music. 

The position begins November 15.  Be on the lookout for new chapters in this adventure!  Until then, make a joyful noise!

I just can't hide it!

What a week!  I've had so much excitement, it's been incredible.  (I just don't think there's enough joyous adjectives to describe it.)

Let's start with last Sunday.

 I got the true privilege of leading a multi-church choir for the installation of Rev. Carol Bodeau at Westside Unitarian Universalist Church.  Thirty wonderful singers from Knoxville area UU churches contributed their voices in celebratory song.  We sang Joyce Poley's award-winning hymn, "Keepers of the Earth," as well as Lucy Holstedt's vibrant anthem, "Welcome In," and Copland's classic, "Simple Gifts."  We opened with a spirited version of, "Enter, Rejoice, and Come In" and closed with a rousing, clapping-full rendition "This Little Light of Mine."

For me, it was amazing to watch the service unfold.  The service elements came together so beautifully and were the culmination of months of work -- from researching and selecting music with Rev. Carol, to coordinating rehearsals with the Music Directors at the area UU churches, to leading individual rehearsals at each congregation and our combined rehearsal, and finally to watching everything come alive on Sunday afternoon.  The choir, accompanist, and drummers brought the music to life better than I ever could have imagined.

Next up, a children's choir rehearsal that ran late - in a good way!  Our kids at ORUUC were so attentive and worked so hard on creating movements and learning the words for their new piece, "A New Day" by Agnes Paulsen, that our rehearsal time just flew by.  I have to admit, I'm kind of missing them on our day off today because...

The rest of my week was spent in rehearsals with the Knoxville Opera's production of Boito's Mefistofele. I'm part of the celestial chorus through a partnership with Knoxville Chamber Chorale.  It was a series of long rehearsals this week with performances Friday night and this afternoon (thus the no children's choir rehearsal this week).  It's a really entertaining show and I enjoyed being able to see a good chunk of the show from onstage behind the actors - and about an hour of the show hanging out in the green room catching up on school work and emails.  I would definitely do it again!  Even with the exhaustion from...

My high school reunion was also this weekend.  Having already committed to the Opera, I was worried that I wouldn't be able to go.  But I managed to find flights that could get me in and out of DC at crazy early morning hours - and the best friend willing to host me and keep up with my crazy schedule.  At the reunion, several people commented "of course!" when I mentioned that I was going back to pursue my music degree.  So funny, even my high school friends knew what I should be doing twenty years ago.

Now, the exhaustion has set in and I'm thankful for a day off tomorrow.  No school, no work, just a day to relax with my kids and catch up on sleep.  Today, I feel successful in doing all the things I wanted to do this week.  I shouldn't even think about tomorrow.  These sweet memories will last a long, long time... I know not every week will be this great, so I'm documenting it while I'm so excited!

*P.S. Shout out to the Pointer Sisters for the lyrics to "I'm so excited"

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

Ah, these are the days of my life.  The days where I wake up at 5:45am and fall into bed after 11pm having barely had a moment to breathe.  Exhausted, but happy.  I still haven't found quite the word to describe it.

First...The Good.  The good is very good.  My new job as ORUUC's Children's Choir Director is really rewarding and, for the most part, really fun!  We've danced the Macarena and learned to draw quarter notes.  We've talked about the shofar and sung about Rosh Hashanah.  We impressed the congregation this past Sunday with our Hebrew.  L'Shana Tovah to you!

My job as the Music Coordinator for Rev. Carol Bodeau's installation at Westside UU Church is nothing short of amazing.  We started rehearsals last week and I have to admit -- I think it's a miracle every time voices come together to create music from some little dots printed on a page.  Dan Forrest planted this idea in my head and it has really grown into a deep appreciation for how music is created.  Rehearsals continue this week and it looks like we'll have between 25-30 folks in the installation choir.  I'm already imagining the great sound of their combined voices.  A miracle, I tell you.

School, while challenging, is going really well.  My first tests in both classes came back with good grades and my piano teacher tells me she can already see my progress.  I swear I learned more in the first three weeks of Music Theory (key signatures, intervals, major/minor relative keys) than anyone has ever taught me about music.  And we're not even half way through the first term!  I've got a lot to learn, but I'm an eager student.

The Bad.  Oh, the bad.  Scheduling is hard.  Two of my classes this semester require work outside of class, so I needed to find more time for school in my week than I expected.  I drive to campus every morning now, which was tough to get used to.  It also means that I'm working very early morning and later afternoon hours to get my day job done so I can break away from my desk for school each day.  At the end of most school/work days, I have to take the kids to their activities and then run off to my own rehearsals.  So I really do have several days a week where I'm up at 5:45am and don't see my bed again until11pm.  Weekends aren't much better, with kids activities, church service, Children's Choir, volunteer activities and more rehearsals.  While I enjoy what I'm doing (even my non-music day job is great), the schedule can be grueling.

The Ugly.  So, so ugly.  Ugly is what happens when you volunteer to hang out at a high school lock-in until midnight and then come home to a vomiting dog.  My weekend went from cleaning the house to singing at a community event with our Mighty House Band to volunteering at the event to the church high school lock in to vomiting dog to sleep to choir rehearsal to children's choir rehearsal to church service to children's choir rehearsal to reorganizing my daughter's bedroom to family dinner to schoolwork to sleep to school to work to karate drop off to... <crash>  Did I mention U-G-L-Y?  My body stopped me in my tracks with a migraine so fierce that I had to cancel everything for Monday night.   No rehearsals, no schoolwork, no emails.  Just resting on the couch in a dark room followed by an early bedtime.  The mind was willing, but the body was having none of it.

Despite the bad and the ugly, I am really happy.  Feeling confident that in working toward my purpose, I am living out my purpose.  My body reminds me from time to time that I am, in fact, human and need to take time to rest in the midst of all the excitement.  Many times, I feel like a little kid - so full of energy toward living out this dream that I can't sleep, thinking of the next thing I want to learn or try or do.  It's exhilarating and exhausting... exhaustarating?  exhilarausting?

Whatever it is, it's beautiful.

Calm Before the Storm

It's August.  The end of summer.  The return of the early morning school bus and the late night choir rehearsal.  Thankfully, the schedule gradually returns this year, with the kids going back to school last week (shifting our morning routine to a VERY early 5:45am), a start to children's choir at ORUUC this week (more on that in a moment), then school for me and Knoxville Choral Society returning later in the month.  By the last week in August, everything will be back in full swing and my life will consist of endless amounts of preparing, rehearsing, organizing, studying, listening, parenting, driving, singing... and very little sleep.  So, in this calm before the storm, I wanted to make sure I got a blog update written.

I'm thrilled to announce that I am now ORUUC's Children's Choir Director!  This K-8 group meets weekly and performs in service about once a month.  We kick off this coming Sunday and I'm really looking forward to spending time with our youngest singers.  Special thank you to David Ensley, the new Music Director at ORUUC, for giving me this opportunity for ongoing professional development.  I've spent the past week digging into kids music books thinking about what's possible for our crew.  I've enjoyed discussing possibilities with one choir member, my 9-year-old daughter.  She's getting remarkably good at telling me which songs sound fun and which sound boring.  Ha!

I've also made headway on the music for Rev. Carol Bodeau's installation at Westside UU Church in October.  It takes time to critically look at songs for their fit -- considering how the lyrics match the themes of the service, how the sound (tempo, rhythms, melody, etc.) fits with the flow of the service, how the difficulty compares with the amount of time we have to rehearse and the singers who volunteered.  I've been taking my time, knowing this process will get faster once I have more experience in selecting music.  And I've really been enjoying listening to all sorts of new music, exploring the UU Musicians Network database, and reaching out to UU composers to learn more about their pieces.

I'm also all squared away with school this semester.  I'm back at Pellissippi State CC for Music Theory I & Ear Training I, along with individual piano instruction.  Classes start in a few weeks, on August 24.

Knoxville Choral Society and Knoxville Chamber Chorale also start back up later this month, with KCS performing a Fall concert and with the Knoxville Symphony's Clayton Holiday Concerts and KCC performing with the Knoxville Opera and Knoxville Chamber Orchestra's Classical Christmas.

So, with my new Children's Choir responsibilities... and my work with Westside UU Church for Rev. Bodeau's installation... and my music classes at Pellissippi State... and Knoxville Choral Society's fall concerts... and Knoxville Chamber Chorale's opera production with the Knoxville Opera... I am ensured a very musical Fall.  And honestly... I can't wait!

Following the Call - Year 1

It's been a year.
A year since I woke up with the call.

It's been a year of celebration.
A year of tears.

It's been a year of education.
A year of intuition.

It's been a year of courage.
A year of humility.

It's been a year of achievement.
A year of disappointment.

It's been a year of connection.
A year of isolation.

It's been a year of determination.
A year of perseverance.

A year of waking up every morning and answering the call.

Answering the call to serve as ORUUC's Temporary Music Director.
Answering the call to go back to school.
Answering the call to coordinate music for the Young Adults at General Assembly (YA@GA) worship services.

And, most recently, answering the call to coordinate music for Rev. Carol Bodeau's installation at Westside UU in Farragut this Fall.  (Thank you for the opportunity, Rev. Carol!)

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to sing with the New World Unity Ensemble and One Human Family at the Baha'i Unity Center in Atlanta.  (Another call that I answered - to come and sing and celebrate with my new friends from GA.)  One song continues to resonate with me, written by William McDowell.

I give myself away
I give myself away
So you can use me

Here I am
Here I stand
Lord my life is in your hands
Lord I'm longing to see
Your desires revealed in me

I give myself away
I give myself away
So you can use me

Take my heart
Take my life
As a living sacrifice
All my dreams
All my plans
Lord I place them in your hands

I give myself away
I give myself away
So you can use me

My life is not my own
To you I belong
I give myself
I give myself to you

To me, it illustrates the mystery behind this calling.  The power of waking up every morning called to serve.  The faith in a power greater than myself (whether you call that God, Lord, Love, Universe, Earth, Nature, Light...).  The deep knowing that on the other side of every obstacle is another opportunity.  Answering the call with eager anticipation of what new experience may come.

And so, I continue to wake up every morning and answer the call.

Here's to the start of another year pursuing music ministry.  Thank you all for joining me on the journey.

Living my faith (GA Recap, Part 3)

Be sure to check out Part 1 and Part 2 before you get here.

By Saturday, I felt free.  I was done with my commitments as Music Coordinator for the Young Adult worship services and all that remained was the business of GA and lending my voice to a Climate Change worship service.  I guess that's how I became open to something beyond music these last two days.

I really enjoyed being a vocalist for the Climate Change worship.  Much of the music you'll be hearing back at ORUUC.  Music that makes you feel grounded, connected.  But also music that challenges you to act.  By the time I left the climate change worship, I understood the power of music and worship to restore the weary and inspire the passive into action.

The worship was followed by the final rehearsal with the GA Choir.  One of the pieces, "We Will Walk Together," was written by Clif Hardin and commissioned by Heidi Brenner Bjerke - a member of my congregation - in memory of her Dad, who came out as a gay man at 78 years old.  I was proud as I shared the story with members of the GA Choir.  Music is so much more powerful when the musicians understand the context behind it.

Then, honestly, it was time for a break.  I hit the meditation room with Amanda and crashed.  Lesson learned: adrenaline only burns so long.  I awoke refreshed and ready for dinner with my fellow ORUUCians.  After a nice dinner catching up on our GA experiences, it was back to the convention center to see Dr. Cornel West deliver the Ware Lecture.  Dr. West structured his lecture after four questions W.E.B. DuBois said every generation must consider, namely:

• How shall integrity face oppression?
• What does honesty do in the face of deception?
• What does decency do in the face of insult?
• How does virtue meet brute force? 

       http://www.uuworld.org/articles/cornel-west-ware-lecture

My view of Dr. Cornel West

He called on the audience to live with integrity.  What I heard, as I listened to him speak, was a call to live my faith.  To act rather than just discuss.  To show rather than just tell.  And it totally changed my Sunday.

Sunday morning started off like any other General Assembly.  Sunday morning worship is always amazing.  Nothing restores your soul like singing with almost 200 people in front of an audience of nearly 5,000.  It's uplifting.  The GA Choir Director, Burt Gulhaugen, is so fun to work with.  My favorite piece (other than "We Will Walk Together, of course) was a gospel number called "Overflowing" by Brian Tate.  Our soloist, Cecelia Hayes, was simultaneously powerful and humble. What a great combination!  I could tell when she was singing about gratitude, she meant every word. During the sermon, Rev. Alison Miller made me laugh with the story of a teenager who said of our UU religion, "You've never heard of it."  And she inspired me with her ideas that we live into the stories we tell.

Then it was on to final pieces of the UU business meeting.  We quickly passed Actions of Immediate Witness supporting creating a global climate agreement and ending immigrant child and family detention.  Then we spent quite a long time debating a third AIW supporting the Black Lives Matter movement.  I would go into the process by which we finally approved it, but honestly I was disappointed with the wordsmithing and nitpicking that went into the process.  I was so proud, so moved, so riled up when it passed.  I felt personally vested in the youth that drafted the AIW and the young adult community who supported their efforts.  I felt like celebrating this step forward for our congregations.   And so I did!

It just so happened that a Black Lives Matter rally was spontaneously organized after the business meeting, but before the closing ceremony.  As a GA choir member, I was supposed to be on stage for the closing ceremony.  So I was faced with a pretty mind boggling decision - sing with the GA choir (which I LOVE and look forward to every year) - or participate in the demonstration.  I'll let you figure out where I ended up:

Photo by Jo Walter

Themes: action, demonstration, reflection

Every year, I come away with something new from GA.  This year, it was living into my desire to be a music director (I often introduced myself as an "aspiring music director"), proving to myself that I could select, organize, and lead music with musicians from around the country, and awakening into a deep sense of wanting to live my UU faith out loud.

See you next year in Columbus!

Celebrating my faith (GA Recap, Part 2)

This is a continuation of my GA Recap.  Be sure to read Part 1.

Thursday, for all intents and purposes, was a "rest day" for me at General Assembly.  At least, in the sense that I didn't have to run or participate in a rehearsal all day.  Instead, I got to savor my day at GA.  I attended workshops on getting UUs to "cross the road" (participate in social justice activities) and leveraging technology in music.  I took in some of the business side of GA as a delegate for my congregation.  I also had dinner with my friend Saffron, who moved to Portland from Tennessee about a year ago.  It was so good to have an evening away from the convention center!  I wrapped up my evening listening to the combined choirs of First UU Portland. It was an excellent program as they prepare to go on an international tour.  Their church has four adult choirs, plus handbell and children's groups.  What an amazing musical community!

Friday was the most inspiring and exhausting day at GA.  We woke up to news of the Supreme Court upholding marriage equality - an event so many among us had fought most of their lives for.  There was much celebration!  I got to sing on the main stage during the Synergy (bridging) worship on Friday evening, so there was a rehearsal with the GA band earlier in the day.  Then I lead the music rehearsal for our Young Adult worship - Yuri and Matt were back as our instrumentalists and our vocalists were joined by three members of One Human Family Choir.  Wow, what powerful vocals we had!

This is where I need to have a little tangent.  When Amanda and I selected music for our two Young Adult worship services, we chose mostly hymns for the first worship (easier to pull together in a quick time frame, since it was Day 1 of the conference) and mostly popular songs for the second worship (premise being that we would have more time to rehearse).  As it turned out, the only rehearsal time we had for the second worship was squeezed into 90 minutes on Friday afternoon.  I took a look at the music, the rehearsal time, and the musicians we had available ... and brainstormed some arrangements on the flight to Portland.  But goodness, was I still nervous.  As it turns out, working with talented musicians is pretty great.  We made quick work of the pieces, divided up solo lines, made up our own harmonies, and coordinated accompaniment.

We also led a workshop on creating worship for young adults.  Along with Amanda, Derrick, and Jim, we shared a few ideas and then let the participants create their own worship.  It was a create session with some really good discussion!

Friday was also Amanda's big day on the GA stage.  She and a colleague (Kenny Wiley) presented a GA Talk on Black Lives Matter.  I sat awestruck that this woman I have known for 6 years, who was afraid of microphones when we first met, commanding the stage with passion and vibrance.  It set me on a course for the rest of the week... that you'll have to wait until my next post to hear more about.

Then it was Friday night.  First, I got to sing with GA Music Coordinator Susan Peck, Amanda, and an incredible vocalist named Lauren Steele on the main stage to open up the Synergy bridging service.  What a treat to be able to honor youth transitioning to Young Adults in our faith.

Photo by Jake Morrill

Afterward, we hosted a worship service to officially welcome the new Young Adults into our community, complete with cake.  Those songs that I worried so much about?  There were a few mistakes, but it absolutely didn't matter -- nearly everyone in the room was singing along!  Our song choices were spot on.  My favorite moment of the day was singing the opening line to "Unwritten" (by Natasha Bedingfield) and the entire room lighting up and singing along.  It was a touching moment, to feel that connected to the young adult community gathered. I felt called and inspired to music ministry all over again.

Adding to the themes from this experience: celebration, inspiration, perspiration

Next up: Saturday - Sunday.  You'd never guess how this story ends!